Joy Comes in the Morning

What truth!

We're experiencing the sunrise here now and it is GLORIOUS!  Pure joy!

I don't know if I would say that the years leading up to the diagnosis were the "night" or if trying to fight our way through the diagnosis to a new way of life was the "night".  It's a toss up.  Both have been challenging for different reasons.

I mean, there were some extremely rough times before Craig was diagnosed last September.  He locked our babysitter out of our house.  He stuck random things in his nose that required trips to the emergency room.  He ran away from home.  He swam in the school toilet.  There were times we'd go to a hotel and we literally couldn't keep him in the room.  We'd go out to dinner and he'd make a scene.  We'd be at the grocery store and have to haul him out kicking and screaming.  It was rough.

However, after diagnosis there were rough times as well.  He was getting better, but our lives were flipping and flopping all over the place.  I was having to learn to cook things I'd never heard of like quinoa.  Rick was having to learn which pills to administer when.  We were having to search far and wide for organic food, grass-fed beef, hormone-free chicken, soaps free of dyes, etc...  It required me to go back to work since our food bills average $1500 / month.

I used to stay awake at night wondering what we were going to do about Craig.  However, after the diagnosis, I would stay awake at night researching .... trying to figure out the things I didn't understand about food and food allergies.  I drove Rick insane with my list of questions and my constant analyzing.  I would make him sit with me and pour over the food journal searching for the culprit until we were both cross-eyed.

We are BY NO MEANS at the finish line and I BY NO MEANS have it all figured out.  However, the enormous ... let me just emphasize that word ... ENORMOUS amount of work we have done this last year is paying off.  Want some examples?  (I'm glad you asked!)

~  I dropped the kids off for school Tuesday morning and didn't worry about what stunt Craig would pull.  First year (out of 7 school / day care / mother's day out dropoffs) that I've ever done that.

~  His teacher hasn't pulled me aside ANY these first few days to request a conference.  First year EVER!  She didn't even look relieved to see me coming Tuesday afternoon (or any of these other days) as if she needed to offload Craig for awhile to regroup.  She just looked at me like she looked at all the other parents.  (Whoa!!)

~  One of our dear friends at church wrote this about Craig on Facebook recently:  "I was in Craig's SS class Sunday and took note of his interactions with people. Julie's has always been my sweetie, but now Craig makes eye contact and has conversation with me!! I'm sorry you have had to endure everything through the years, but so happy that you pursued a diagnosis and then have been willing to follow up with the entire diet situation."

~  His teacher wrote this in an email to me:  "Craig has had a wonderful day! ... Please brag on him for an excellent day.  (He is sitting with me as I type this and is quite proud)  :)"

There are other examples I could give you that won't mean quite as much - but they mean the world to me.

~  I no longer find myself planning trips to the store (or any other place) around him.  (Before, I always needed to make sure he was in a good mood, had something to entertain him, and always needed a reward to offer if he would just behave until I could get the groceries and get out.)

~  He now laughs when we play jokes on him (instead of crying and stomping) ... which in turn means that we have alot more fun with him.  (For example, yesterday I honked the horn when he walked in front of the van making him jump.  He in turn jumped into the van giggling and attacked me.  The day before I locked the doors to the van with me and Julie inside and made him dance outside the van before we'd let him in.  He laughed hysterically as he did a Michael Jackson move and then we let him in.)

~  We attended an Express game awhile back and he played basketball with a large group of boys.  This would have NEVER happened 14 months ago.  He would have been kicked out of the game because he couldn't play well with others.

~  He told me yesterday that he has organized a tag football game at school.  It's his team against Langston's (his friend) team each day at recess.

I will be the first to stand up and tell you this has been by far the roughest journey of my life.  I have cried more tears, had more sleepless nights, and lost more meals over this than any other single event I've been through.  I also know that we are not typical.  We are extreme, and yes, I'm aware of it.  However, I've never been anything else.  I don't know anything BUT all the way.

And I found great encouragement when Craig's former preschool teacher (who has kept up with his progress) wrote to me this week and said this:  "God gave YOU this challenge because he knew you would rise to the occasion and become an advocate for your children and children everywhere."  Talk about speaking a blessing over my life!

So, while the night has been one heck of a night and it has been long and I'd be a fool to think that there aren't more nights around the bend, joy has come ... and it's morning.